Welcome to The Dettes

Follow the adventures of Claudette and Paulette - the twins.
Love and Kisses, Paulette and Claudette

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Curiouser and Curiouser

Another aftershock threw us to the hard, sloping ground.

"Paulette!"

"Here, I'm here!"  I felt her warmth burrowed next to me.

"Can you stand?  Paulette, are you okay? Is your blindfold still on?"  I asked urgently.

"Yes.  Yes to all.  Let's keep moving."  Holding each other for support as we staggered to our feet, we then gingerly crept toward a narrow slit of light - a door, perhaps?  Another aftershock!  Paulette and I fell, this time rolling and picking up speed, like a couple of baby bunnies headed down the rabbit hole.  We landed against the shaft of light.  No one else had followed us.

We got to our feet and groped around for the door knob.  It turned and the door sprung open to a dimly lit room.  I pulled the blindfold off my sister and we looked around the room.  There were shadows of creatures, people? lurking in the corners and on the settees.  I pulled Paulette's hand close to my chest and started to pick my way towards the back of the room.  As my eyes adjusted, I saw that the figures were indeed people.  They were all very thin, their musculature looking as if though it were made of gelatin.  Their faces were gaunt and putty colored, no matter if they were Asian, White or Black.  "Opium," Paulette whispered in my ear.  I realized she was right.

We made our way to another set of doors, and here the mood changed.  Underneath the blazing chandeliers, gamblers were playing craps, poker and roulette.  The men were dressed in top hats and tails; the few women on the floor sauntered with trays of cocktails and whiskeys.  They wore very short skirts, fishnet stockings and several wore huge red plumes of feathers in their hair.    When these women bent over to place the drinks in front of the gamblers,  their bulging bosom momentarily caught the attention of the men.  "Hey, there, Louise, you are looking mighty lovely this evening."  This particular gambler thrust a coin in the woman's cleavage.   Cigar smoke wafted from every gaming table.

I leaned into Paulette and whispered, "Do you think this is still 1906?  What happened to Ji and Lia?  Or was it Li and Jia?"

Paulette smirked.  "Ah, jeez, I have no idea.  Let's just hang back for a moment and see what unfolds."

Just then, the door behind the roulette table thrust open and in walked Charlie Sheen.  "Charlie Sheen!  What the hell?  Paulette!  Do you see?  That's Charlie Sheen."

"You are so right."  Charlie Sheen was a television personality, but more famous for his crack addiction and crazy rantings about "winning," and "tiger blood."  He, too, was dressed in top hat and tails and smoking a large cigar.  "Come on, let's roll."  Paulette was already striding towards Mr. Sheen.  There was nothing I could do, but follow.

"Mr. Sheen, I haf been waiting for you."  My sister was speaking with a Russian accent.  She curtsied, and Mr. Sheen picked up Paulette's hand to kiss the top of it.   "Oh, Mr. Sheen, you are so, sooo..." Paulette fumbled for the correct word, "winning."  He cocked his head to one side, and kissed her hand again.

Mr. Sheen's gaze turned to include me and he said nothing for a moment, but a smile slowly played out.  "Twins?  I love twins."

"I tought you would.  You seem like  man who loves gut time."  Paulette leaned in, pulled Mr Sheen's top hat off his head and placed it at an angle over her eyebrow.  "You smell like a man, Mr. Sheen."  She took a really big whiff and stepped back to appraise her prey.  I stood still.

"Oh, excuse me my manners.  Dis ees my sister. " I started to open my mouth, but Paulette gently placed her hand over it.  "She speaks only the Russian.  She never had time to learn the English.  She ees lion tamer in circus.  But, sometimes,  she tames the blood of tigers. "

"Da."  I said.

"Hmmmm.  That's interesting,"   Mr.  Sheen ran his hand through his abundant head of hair, his eyes never leaving my sister.  "And what do you do for a living, Miss ...?"

"I run circus.  And I am artist of trapeze. Oh, my name ees Agrippa, and this ees my twin, Anya."

"Well, let's get on the A train, ladies.  Can I buy you a drink?"

"Da,"  I said.

Mr Sheen snapped his fingers, but wasn't able to find a waitress immediately.  "I'll be right back, girls.  Don't go anywhere!"  By now, I assessed that our clothing had changed again.  We were wearing togs from the 1920s, shapeless dresses that skimmed our knees.  We sported bob haircuts and red lips.  I was fascinated to see a cigarette holder in my hand.  "Paulette - curiouser, and curiouser!"

"I know, I know.  Hang in there!  I think I can find a way out of here."

"Do you think we have sort of pseudo jumped time?  I mean, is it possible the fire - the 1906 fire - could still be a threat?"

"I don't know.  But we need to keep our wits about us."  Paulette caught sight of Mr.  Sheen toting our drinks.  "Shhhh!"

That first sip of bourbon forgave my sins.  I silently thanked Jesus for allowing me this moment of softer edges.  I looked at my sister, who - still wearing the top hat, skimmed her finger along Mr. Sheen's jawline.  "What does girl do to find  place to stay?"

"Wellll," Mr. Sheen smiled, "Chinatown is no place for you girls.  Why don't I accompany you to my hotel?  It's downtown and I'm certain you'll find what you need there."  Paulette spun around to smile at me.  I shrugged and placed my cocktail on the bar.  A young woman brought our coats.  Our coats?

Mr. Sheen held open a door I hadn't noticed before.  The air was chilly, but fresh.  I breathed in a big gulp, and kept a close eye on my sister, who remained fully in character.  "Mr. Sheen, it would be nice to have leetle something to eat, no?  Do you know such a place?"  She linked arms with the tall actor.

"Sure, we'll head down to the wharf.  Have you ever heard of the Buena Vista?  That means, "beautiful view," by the way."  He smiled at her smugly, as if though he had mined the gold, but had yet to alert the media.

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